Bigfoot Still Eluding Capture

How many of you have ever seen Bigfoot?

No, not the movie or any of the grainy footage from a block away that always seems to be the only window into the Big Guy’s life.

No really: How many of you — or your friends or family members or anyone considered fully in control of their marbles — has ever seen Bigfoot, Sasquatch, the Abominable Snowman, Yeti, etc., etc.?

But despite the ongoing lack of sharp, indisputable photographs, Bigfoot seems to keep capturing our imagination. And it’s an international phenomenon, apparently. He lives in the Himalayas, he lives in the forests of the Great Northwest, he lives in a small patch of woods in Pennsylvania….

Yeah, the Big Hairy Dope has been seen nearly everywhere.

It was in the 1950s that Bigfoot made his debut, and nearly everyone on the planet has now seen the blurry video/photo of what looks like a man in a hairy suit stride across a forest clearing and disappear.

Since then, there have been thousands of sightings of Bigfoot and his relations all across the globe. But somehow — somehow — no one’s ever gotten a great photo or captured one.

Heck, no one’s even gotten close enough to shoot him — and I know there are plenty of hunters who would just love to have a Bigfoot Head on their wall.

And I don’t think you’d need a Bigfoot hunting license to do it.

With the exception of that great old movie “Harry and the Hendersons,” most Bigfoot movies and stories portray the poor schmuck as mean, violent and extremely dangerous.

And as humans, many of us just love to be scared. We like to think there MIGHT be a big scary manlike creature out there in the woods, just waiting to pounce.

So far, though, no Bigfoot has ever been charged with a crime. Not one misdemeanor, let alone a felony.

So there seems to be just two possibilities: Bigfoot is actually a shy, rather nice, misunderstood manimal or some wild-eyed monster bent on attacking unsuspecting campers.

The choice is up to you.

But if you can manage to get a decent closeup photo or — better yet — lure one into your house — let me know.

It’ll be the story of the century.

Originally published at https://www.stevenvporter.com on August 11, 2021.